What in the world?

Last week, the OG Athlete Peen Swilling Chicks came back. Of course, they all suddenly had these deep ties to NYC [:/] and decided  to move back at the EXACT same time. I’m 100% sure it was just a coincidence. I didn’t recap the first episode cuz all that mattered was Evelyn and Jennifer’s embarrassing public outburst. We all learned that Evelyn and Jenn are the biggest birds to ever walk this Earth and that Ev e would punch Jennifer in the motherfuckin face if she didn’t ca lm her fuckin tone. Oh also, just like  me, you’ve probably always said ‘mending fences’ … according to Tami it’s ‘mencing’. 

Kenya and White Girl Kesha

- Kenya, girl, you’re pushin 40.  

- She’s really still holding on to this dream of being Beyonce, giiiirl, you gotta let some shit go.

- So she shows

- Now on to Grandma Kenya and her fugazi ass team. What in all the fucks was going on there? I’m so mad dude was telling the lady that they were providing her with a talented artist. Dude, NOBODY KNOWS HER.  Now, obviously normal people would know that they couldn’t shoot a complete video without a wardrobe and with just four hours, but looking at those You Tube clips, I see that four hours would be enough time to shoot, edit, and upload.

- I don’t have any problem with the fact that she did a YT vid, but what she did was ABSOLUTELY LAME. Girl, just record yourself singing on your webcam like everybody else. Then at least

- Kenya didn’t like the criticism she received and felt like she was being slapped 5 times. Maybe that’s what she needs.

- Umm, I know Kenya asked Kesha for help, that’s what friends do, but homie who designated you the director or any damn thing of the project? Let her do her wack ass video if that’s what she wants. If you want to help her, you should, but this whole ‘I’m not putting my name on it’ shit. Have a stadium full of seats, gringa.

- Sooooo random, but as I was looking for a picture to use for this post, I came across the lovely picture you see above. Apparently Ms. You Tube was arrested for trying chasing her husband, former Golden State Warrior, Charlie Bell. What the hell is going on in life?This is the type of person that goes to Juliet.

Evelyn

-Here’s my theory on this bitch here – she had her daughter really young and she wasn’t able really enjoy her younger years, so now she’s trying to make up for it. She had a very sweet moment in this episode where she discussed her brother-in-law and his cancer [which I hope he can get better news on], but for the most part, when we see her she’s doing the ABSOLUTE most and being as big of a hoodrat as possible. The ratchetness is then really on a hundred, thousand, TRILLION cuz of her age. I mean, giiiirl, your daughter is in college and your behavior would be too ridiculous for her so what you really look like?

She was talking all that shit about Kesha being left at the alter. GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL, you had a 10 year engagement! She was right about bitches frontin though.

Royce

- Last week Royce did what she did best: talk shit with some big ass Amar’e Stoudemire goggles for glasses on her head. This bitch swears she’s so above everyone else when really she’s on the same bullshit, just that Evelyn and Tami are louder. 

- This week she went to audition for some random straight to BET coon film. All that neck rollin and shit – hoodrat classics. I don’t know, I don’t see an Oscar in her future – she wasn’t horrible but she thinks very highly of herself. Giiiiirl, you are NOT Juilia Roberts. Slow your roll.

- Who the fuck is Desmond? Did I miss something? This bitch is always in some type of relationship and she’s always so damn happy and in love. Girl, pump the breaks. I’m sure you were happy and in love with Dwight and look what that got you – a fuckin gag order and law suit. I’m glad Tami reminded her that she’s always so damn giddy about some penis.

- Oh, by the way, I’m a super nosey mofo and I looked up  ‘Desmond Tampa’ and all that came up was Desmond Jennings of the Tampa Bay Rays. She said he plays football though, so I think this bitch is talking about a college player. I mean, I joke around saying that college players look like PHD students but in reality they are babies. ROYCE IS A FUCKIN PEDOPHILE.

Suzie and Jennifer

- These bitches eat out a whoooole lot.

- Suzie is trying to get her Tami on and is being too honest. Now, she’s not lying – Kenya’s shit was absolutely lame, but certain things don’t need to be said. She was being very rude to Kenya and it was unnecessary.

- I LOVE THAT SUZIE KEEPS PRONOUNCING KESHA LIKE THE SINGER KE$HA.